Reclaim Your Life

I think one of the things that I noticed a lot is obsession over past hurts. That's what keeps people stuck most of the time. So how do we get rid of it? How do we go past it?

What happens many times is we are stuck in the past. But for our brain it doesn't matter if something happened in the past, present, or future, same parts of our brain light up when we experience something. So for a brain doesn't matter whether it's happened yesterday or right now, you get to relive the same kind of emotions, the same kind of feelings as if they're happening now. So how do you release your obsession over past hurts?

Well, number one is acknowledging that it happened. Having the acceptance, acceptance is the first thing you need to look at. That's what's happening. Accept the situation, accept what has happened, and realize that you don't have to be in that state anymore. You don't have to be stuck, because the only person is that keeping you stuck right now is you. So accept the fact...

I think the first step is to understand that forgiveness does not exonerate the perpetrator. Forgiveness liberates the victim. It’s a gift you give yourself. – T.D. Jakes

When it comes to recovering after breakup or divorce, one of the important things one must do is practice forgiveness. It’s necessary to understand that you are not doing this for another person, you are actually doing yourself a favor and giving yourself a gift of freedom and pursuit of happiness. It is not about getting the other person off the hook however they wronged you or however they made you feel it is all actually about you.

And of course, it can be difficult to forgive, especially if you've been married for a long time or have been in a long-term relationship. And you dedicated your life, your attention, your love, all your good qualities to the other person. And you may have put them on a pedestal and have forgotten about yourself. Forgiving them may be very hard and it will take some...